E024: How Taking Ownership Saved My Life with Former Commando & Bestselling Author Chris Thrall

Chris Thrall: 0:03

So the military for me really was uh oh my god what a just have to do 50 Press ups and 10 put up some be able to swim and run a mile and a half and you know, under 10 minutes 12 minutes and you're gonna pay me how much where do I sign up? And the notion that I thought I was, you know, in some way a man by wielding a weapon and I would have killed anybody that had gone got in my way is just so utterly abhorrent to Me now. That I'm so glad it never happened because I don't know if I could have lived with the consequences Scott of of shooting an innocent teenager to make the the global elite even more rich and powerful than they already are.

Unknown: 1:06

And let's just say eight or 12 triads piled out the butt back with meat cleavers, and they just did this guy over good and proper.

Scott Radford: 1:21

Legend Welcome. I'm Scott ride for this is the performance hackers. And today we speak with Chris Thrall, a former Royal Marines commando and best selling author who shares probably one of the most incredible life stories I've ever heard from the extreme highs of operating in an elite military unit and building a global successful business to ending up homeless and suffering acute mental illness from crystal meth addiction and even working for the Hong Kong triads. But I'm keen to know what rock bottom was for Chris, and how did he manage to rebuild his life to become Veteran of the Year and an international best selling author and extreme endurance athlete, his last effort being a 999 mile Ultra run with basically no training. He's raised 1000s for charity and the awareness of mental health. And this is one of the most vulnerable and unfiltered conversations I think I've ever had on this podcast. So thank you so much for Chris for sharing some powerful lessons here. Let's go. Aquarius, welcome to the show. Thank you so much for being here, man.

Unknown: 2:22

Oh, Scott is so kind that you invited me thank you for taking an interest in my humble my humble life.

Scott Radford: 2:30

I wouldn't call it humble. I think that when you agreed to come on the show at you know, relatively short notice, I started digging into a little bit more of your life. And I completely got into overwhelm because I was like, Holy shit, how the hell do I research uncover your incredible life in like one short podcast? I feel like it should be a series. So I can't wait to hopefully do a little bit of it justice. What is it that we need to know about your childhood to understand the young man who joined the Marines?

Unknown: 2:56

Oh, what a fantastic question. So probably, it's quite a standard childhood for I don't know if it's a majority of servicemen, but certainly quite a lot. I experienced a lot of trauma, a lot of stuff that a toddler shouldn't go through and then, and then a child and even as a teenager, I was, you know, I was homeless for the first time at 15 Kicked out at home again at 17. And it was I was living in my car when I felt so desolate and alone in life. I thought, Do you know what I actually am going to join the Marines who has a friend who bet bet me I couldn't. He just joined the Marines. And he bet me I couldn't join up. Because it's really tough to actually get into training, you have to do a three day course. And on that course, it's pretty ninja. It's it's certainly the hardest thing you will ever have done in your life at that moment. And let's just say your Michaels 15 of us rocked up there. And I think they soon whittled that down to about I don't know, six people. Yeah, childhood trauma x, we're talking extreme childhood trauma. And this is something that catches a lot of servicemen up once they leave because obviously there's no therapy, in the in the forces

Scott Radford: 4:21

was joining that sort of intense extreme environment that sort of had to engage at your best guess. Was there some form of avoidance into dealing with what you are going through and escaping that or looking back at that? Did that serve you joining the Marines?

Unknown: 4:35

Again, another great, great questions. Yes, I've done what I've done all my life, which is run away. Still do it now. You know, like yourself, I ran away to learn how to fly aeroplanes. Jump out of them, travel the world, working out, you know, work with kids in Africa. Lots, lots and lots of substance misuse I suppose you'd call it just an the Marines was no different. When you have an unstable home life, you can't focus at school. You know, your because your your deep down you you experience a sense of unease that you don't even know you have. It's only when it manifests in later life in things like substance use and bad relationships and you know, the inability to, for example, function in a job that you realise, oh, hang on, I think I'm dealing with something here. But when you're a teenager I, to me, it was just will look, I haven't got any qualifications bar to Oh, levels, tried it at college, and I'd kind of mess that up. I'm on unemployed and getting things it was 3030 pounds a week back in the in the 80s. And I'm obviously not ready for university, it's not something you'd even consider. And life just seems to work for other people. Yeah, people that can't leave the fifth year, and they go into the sixth form, they leave the sixth form, and they, they either go directly to university or they do and access. And all of that just seems so alien to you when when you can't apply yourself in life. So the military for me really was that oh my god, what? A just have to do 50 Press ups and 10 Push ups and be able to swim and run a mile and a half and you know, under 10 minutes, 12 minutes, and you're gonna pay me how much? Where do I sign up? Oh, and I get to travel the world. This was really sounding like a good, a good option. And you go from being or in my case, and many of our cases you go from someone who has a quote unquote, a failure in life to suddenly being an elite Royal Marines Commando. And the only caveat there is you've got to say yes. Even when you don't mean it, and you got to kill other teenagers who are you know, you got to work for the for the ruling elite.

Scott Radford: 7:09

What was the cost of that? Looking back at that experience? What was the cost of saying yes, when you didn't mean it? And like you said, having to kill other teenagers? Do you ever look back at that and sort of evaluate the cost of that?

Unknown: 7:21

Yeah, I'm I'm envious of today's young men because they've got something called the Internet. They can you know, get a search engine up and find out who controls the world find out the truth behind let's say, global events when things go bang somewhere on the planet who really makes it go bang not who the the mass media tells the brainwash public made it go bang, right. And little by little of art as I've done over 53 years, you piece the jigsaw together, and then you get a very real picture. And the notion that I thought I was, you know, in some way a man by wielding a weapon and I would have killed anybody that had got in my way is just so utterly abhorrent to Me now that I'm so glad it never happened because I don't know if I could have lived with the consequences Scott of shooting an innocent teenager to make the global elite even more rich and powerful than they already are. But going back to your point we we didn't know this back then we didn't have internet you thought if you join the commandos you're you're one of the good guys like you're here for for freedom and democracy. And you know, righteousness and that's how indoctrinated we were we were we are you join you're a kid went to the recruiting office on a 17 signed on the dotted line when I was 18. Got my green hat when I was 19. We we've got that and glamorise it, Scott

Scott Radford: 8:56

Yeah. Was there a moment from your military service that sort of still affects you today, either positive or negative?

Unknown: 9:03

A plethora of things a whole whole range right from the start. That don't get me wrong. I was homeless and living in my car. One of my favourite films of all time was An Officer and a Gentleman where Richard Gere famously screams that his drill instructor. I've got nowhere else to go. That was me, Scott. I was so incredibly proud to be accepted into the what is essentially the toughest military basic training on the planet. I was prouder to be accepted into the Marines than I was to get my my green lead. Uh, you know, it meant so much to a damaged, abused, young man. You know, I could prove to the world that like I shouldn't have had to prove myself to anyone. This is the this is how the military recruit. I what I needed in my life was good adults to put their arm around me and say, Chris, do you know what You're actually alright. And I gather you, you've had to face a lot of nonsense. That's not your fault. That's adults fault. They shouldn't have behaved like that. You know, that's, that's how we should be bringing our young people up. We need to teach enlightenment philosophy from a young age as we would have done when we lived in indigenous communities, and get away from these monsters that are controlling everything. I hope I hope I answered your, your, you know, life's not simple. I could sit here and tell you what a bloody hero I am. And you know how evil this this dictator, isn't it? But it's all nonsense. It's all a false construct. And, yeah, we're in desperate times, if you see how brainwashed young people are into love into hero worship in the military, now, it's utterly frightening. It's not just young people, it's most men that have a very weak sense of self a weak identity, that they attach this hero worship to the military, because they see the military is living the life that they've never had the courage to leave. Whereas what they don't realise is now you've done it the right way. It's it. Does this make sense? Scott, it's, I'm just wondering,

Scott Radford: 11:16

for the people at the moment for young guys like yourself before you join the Marines with that weak sense of self, maybe that have come up in tough environments and are looking for something? What would you tell them now in order to even start to look at gaining that sense of self to be in a position where they don't look outwards? For something like the military for that purpose and that acceptance?

Unknown: 11:39

Do you know, it's another great question, and sometimes there's no easy answer for things? For example, how can you turn away a disenfranchised young person who couldn't focus at school? What's their life in front of them really is a call centre, isn't it a call centre, maybe factory work, or sitting in an office behind a screen for the next 40 years, you really can see why the military is appealing, can't you even though it's absolutely boring when you actually get in, out of your military career, 85% of the time, if not 90%, you'll be sat around waiting, just sat waiting, waiting to go home for the weekend, waiting to move chairs and tables, waiting to be shouted out by some person that you utterly despise, though, well, that, you know, but then there's that small element of excitement. That's just Ultra exciting. Yeah, I sail to Barbados once on an on an aircraft carrier. One of the greatest experiences of my life, I patrol down the white lines in a major British city, or Irish city, depending on what your Polit political beliefs are. Yeah, with a machine gun.

Scott Radford: 12:56

So how did you come to the decision to leave the Marines and what sort of happened next,

Unknown: 13:00

I left and then my childhood trauma caught up with me. It caught up me I moved to Hong Kong to run what what what was essentially quite a successful business I'd worked really hard at one month in the Marines, I started a network marketing organisation or network marketing electronic products. I got in contact with guy in Hong Kong. And with his kind of taking the lead, we developed the biggest business in the Asia Pacific. For an already established American corporation. Basically, it was it was called quorum International. And they marketed products for Chinese OEM, which is original equipment manufacturer. So basically, a big factory in China manufacturing, manufacturing, whatever this company wanted, and I was a networker for it. And one month in the Marines, we turned over, it was about$100,000. Uh, you gotta remember, this is 25 years ago. So that would be probably$750,000 Now, and my bonus check for that was two and a half times what I earned in the Marines. So I and a lot of other people thought I'd made it for life, you know, I was gonna get the Porsche 911 and all this sort of stuff. I put my notice in the Marines to leave as soon as I could, which was 18 months. By the time I got on the train to leave Plymouth whereas was serving to go to the airport to fly out to Hong Kong. Everything had crashed. It was no fault of my own this this marketing company couldn't bring the products out fast enough. And as such, their network just folded like a, like a house of cards, you could say. So I ended up in Hong Kong, determined to make a go of my life. I didn't want to go back to the UK because, you know, we had this conversation before didn't weigh this when you've had a bit of a tie. rest of the world you don't want to wake up in the dark and rain of England and get on the bus and go to a factory. So I stopped in the in Asia, at the same time. What had previously been, I guess what you call social substance use. So dance parties basically started to get serious sit more serious. Hong Kong is, I guess you'd say it's part of the Golden Triangle in Asia. And there's an awful lot of very strong drugs there.

Scott Radford: 15:35

And you are you talking about the your book you wrote eating smoke? This sort of covers this period of time? Yes. Which is an incredible book. I actually listened to the podcast and cheated a little bit, but I listen to the three part podcast and I just listened with my mouth open because I just thought, Oh, my goodness, like you at some stage were involved with working as a doorman for the tribes as well. Is that correct? Yes.

Unknown: 15:57

So in a nutshell, I rocked up in Hong Kong Scott, I was exactly the same person in my mind as the one before I joined the Marines, as in lost, probably a bit lonely, although, you know, it's a long way from home to be on your own. The difference was, when I got introduced to crystal meth, it became like a crutch for me. I just loved it so much. I learned loads of stuff about myself. I'd wile away the night hours, sort of Wired off my head, painting and drawing and writing song lyrics and all this stuff. I was told I was a failure at school, I found that no, I'm actually like, I'm, I'm not brilliant, but I'm certainly quite good at this. And, you know, hence why I've written failure at school wrote a best selling an internationally best selling book, that that was the kind of what you call the honeymoon period on crystal meth. And then the time comes where that ceases, and your life starts to spiral out of control. And in order to rectify your your addictive mindsets, as well, look, you've just got to take more of the drug, you know, just if you can get some more of it, you can make all this stuff better, are a bit like a gambler desperate to recoup their losses, that dub keeps doubling their bets. And of course, we all know where that n ends up.

Scott Radford: 17:22

And were you aware of this at the time? Were you aware that you were sort of spiralling in or did you just think this is normal?

Unknown: 17:28

You never can be aware? I knew I was addicted. Because I believe in being honest with myself, I just was like, come on, Chris, you've been to this. Dealers house, select the second time this week, then it would become like three times a week. I knew I had an issue with it. I also knew it was going to take me to hell and back. And I was like, let's go. You know, I'm really have a choice, Scott. Right. And this is not negative. I'm so glad I passed. I wouldn't recommend anyone else does it. But for me, yeah, it took me to hell and back, I ended up losing my mind something called Clinical psychosis or amphetamine psychosis. And at the same time, kind of crazily, I was working as a nightclub doorman. As you say, for the Hong Kong triads. It was kind of like one of the last jobs left I could get, because I just burned my bridges everywhere else. And yeah, things got really serious there. So I'm phasing in, in and out of the most serious mental health.

Scott Radford: 18:33

What are you telling yourself at the time? What was what was your internal dialogue? Can you give us a little insight into it?

Unknown: 18:38

Oh, gosh, so I had two voices in my head. Right? Not like they say on TV is not like the devil or something. They you you've got your thoughts, which is like yeah, shall I make a cup of tea? And then you have this psychosis thought that slide? Where do you want a cup of tea? Do you really want wondered at n n n, it's chucking in this bizarre mixed messages to you, you start to read too much into everything. It really becomes like everything becomes one big conspiracy. And I got so um, well, that at one point, I tried crawling across, there was a wire cable between my tenement block. So tenement being, you know, like a small skyscraper. And the one on the other side of the cafe Road in Hong Kong, and in my mind, all my Marines training, and the congratulations that I had, for example, my cousin was a colonel in the Marines and he was really pleased I, you know, I joined and gave me good advice. And I had this letter from him that he sent me in training as a really nice little handwritten with an Admiralty kind of letterhead and everything and I'm reading through it and he's saying, when you're walking across Dartmoor jumping across Dartmoor at two in the morning in the pouring rain, you might wonder why you're joined. But I promise you this crew as it will all come good in the end something like this. I'm up on this roof crawling across this wire cable 70 metres above the traffic below, in my mind doing what we call the commando crawl, thinking that my Marines training was for this moment. And that letter from my cousin had primed me for this moment. And if I can just crawl across this cable to the other side of the street to this other block, which would have been a bit random rocking up someone else's bloody building, but I thought I was just gonna get all my answers in life, almost like a massive awakening, almost to the point where I imagined there were people there that from my past that would suddenly appear and it would be like, Whoa, we've been waiting for your Dude, where have you been? Come on, you know? Did you not suss that? That's that's one incident, you could you could say,

Scott Radford: 20:57

What do you think you were searching for in those moments, then looking back? Well, the

Unknown: 21:01

whole of my life, everything, travelling 85 countries across all seven continents, you know, all the adventure, sports, everything has just been a quest for knowledge. And I guess driving that deep down is knowing that something is not quite right in life, in your life or in life in general, as well in life in general. I mean, for me to have gone through what I did as a child and what many many others do that's not right, is that I mean, something's not right in society, especially back in the 70s. You know, a lot of stuff was hushed up, and you watch the television, not that not that I'd watched this version these days. But back then, yeah, you watch the TV and they're making that it's all that happy families, you know, like EastEnders and that we live in such a wonderful caring? We don't so yeah, I think Scott like a, like a quest for knowledge. Really. I'd say I've I've sort of come not, I don't know full circles the right word, but I'm very much on the spiritual path. Now. I believe in making a bigger connection in life.

Scott Radford: 22:10

I'd love to cover that in just a second actually, because that is quite a incredible transformation. But the story that you just told us about crawling across the wires over busy main road in Hong Kong, was that rock bottom for you? Was there a moment that you felt this is rock bottom at which you had that self awareness to sort of change it or turn it around? Now that

Unknown: 22:31

wasn't even like near rock bottom? Although I know it sounds pretty serious. So I mean, my my fellow doorman or another English guy, he was also a doorman for the triads or triad rang club. And he was sat on the steps of his club one night and a transit van pulled up. And let's just say eight or 12 triads piled out the butt back with meat cleavers, and they just did this guy over good and proper, being a true British hardener. He was back on the door three days later all bandaged up and there too, so his thumb back on where he put his hand up to protect himself and this cleaver chopped his thumb up. That was the environment I was in and I was mentally unwell. You can imagine how much I was pushing my luck. Not not intentionally. I was, you know, addiction is out of your control. It's not you know, Nobody chooses to like nearly lose their life in Hong Kong, or to crawl across the wire cable. It's this is just this is deep down trauma having it's, it's a fact. But no, I came back to the UK for the first couple of weeks. Again, it was like a honeymoon because I was away from everything, you know, all the substance says, and I vary pretty much like back to myself quite quickly. Although, you know, a psychologist would probably say Chris, you got quite a lot of stuff you bury in there. And you're gonna have to deal with that at some point. But no, you know, my addictive mindset kicked in after about a couple of weeks I thought, right if I just go and score a little bit of, you know, amphetamine off one of my old buddies, and it'll be fine. And yeah, I was born ready bored. I'd been the frontman of a Hong Kong nightclub run by the 14k in a nightclub district gang Lang district that stayed open 24/7 I could go at any time in the day or night, go downtown. I'd know people in all the clubs, we'd get on the dance floor, dance the night away, go back to a party in a mall. You know, in the morning, we'd go to the after party. That's when the bar is started. And yeah, and it was exciting. And of course I was really high all the time. So it was to come back to the UK was really underestimate how depressing it probably was. And because I started mucking around with amphetamine again, it just knocked me down to a level I'd never experienced before. The depression I didn't know what depression was. I didn't know I'm really depressed. And I kept trying to self medicate with my benefits check which I got, what every fortnight I got sort of 80 quid or something to live on might have been 80 pound a week, I can't remember. But it all went on the gear, just to try to pat myself up to get some life back. And then when it ran out, which inevitably did after sort of four days, sometimes five days, and I wouldn't sleep for five days, just crazy, Scott, you know, I'd like to have a decorating project in the house and I just stay up for five days doing it. And to be honest, I'd completely screw it up because I was just so uncoordinated and tired and hallucinating from no sleep, wouldn't eat for five days, then I literally wake up, realising I'd fallen asleep like wherever I was full she was in who is in my house, so wouldn't have wanted to, like, be in bloody public. And, you know, I'd wake up like on the living room floor and I'd been lying there for over 24 hours. And at that point, starvation would kick in I'd realised I was literally starving I haven't eaten for five days, I haven't slept for five days. I've burned all these calories because I've just been on the go nonstop and and it was awful. My weekly my fortnightly shot would be I'd have like one pound 87 left after buying all the buying the gear I used to shoplift Bob row, just so on this thin white bread that I'd buy for you know, seven PLO for something, I could at least have a little tree and then I got caught shoplifting and well almost got caught. And it was so embarrassing. It was just it's just just so low. And then I just trashed the house, not not out of anger or anything I got convinced it was my skin would crawl so badly, which was essentially the amphetamine trying to get out of my system, you know, when it wants is overwhelmed your liver and your kidneys, it's got to come out through the skin. And it's horrible, it makes you itch, and you get convinced that you've you know, you've got like lice or something. So I was just taking furniture in the back garden and burning it and spray in lice spray everywhere and, and go at getting on these wild goose chases, that was so exhausting, and impossible to put into words are just mad, you know, I didn't I couldn't afford heating. So I'd fill the bath with cold water. And then I pour bleach in it, and then I climb in to try to get rid of this itch. You know, it's just it's insanity. It's just a horrible, lonely place to be.

Scott Radford: 27:48

Did you have any friends or family around?

Unknown: 27:50

Our they couldn't be dealing with all this. They didn't even know what a drug look like, let alone like their sons come back from Hong Kong just they tried. But they just it was too much for them. Scott, you know, it wasn't fair on them.

Scott Radford: 28:03

So you isolated yourself from the people that loved you around you.

Unknown: 28:07

Yeah, I distance myself because every time someone tries to help you in that scenario, they always do it on their terms. So if I found someone said, Look, I'm really struggling. Could you help because I've got like a I've got to get up the hospital. They'd say, Yeah, Chris, right. If you can meet me and they'd like name some of free miles away from where you and your friggin come and pick me up. And this was like a recurring thing. And so I was on these wild goose chases, shivering, freezing cold, starving, hungry, smashing my place and it just it kept coming to a head. I think I had what you'd probably describe as about three nervous breakdowns like where I physically I couldn't go on any longer just hit the deck and cried my eyes out, you know, cut long story short since a bit depressing. I woke up one day shivering on the floor. It took me a while to remember who I was. That was a recurring thing. Yeah, you can't. You can't remember your own name. Despite this madness going on. All the kids in my street I lived in like a Kodi sack. Like my house was almost like new one. I bought it and now I trashed it. But and the kids in my street. Absolutely love me. Right? They just fought the world for me because I was basically the only adult that ever gave him any time. You know, I'm live like living in a nightmare and no one knows it. I woke up on the floor Scott. I looked in my pocket I'd about 50 or 60 pay. I'm starving. For go to the corner shop. I can get a pasty right. And then I had two kids kicking a ball around out the front, front of the house. I knew if I went out the door they're all going to come run out Chris and I couldn't face him. I felt so out out of my own skin out of myself who I was. I couldn't go out and Chris How come the nicest guy those kids know, the only one ever gives them any time? Why are you doing this to yourself? Something's doesn't make sense. And then I thought back to my childhood, Scott, and I thought about that little kid that went through all that stuff he shouldn't have gone through. And yet, who's doing it to him, now, I'm doing it to him, you know, I'm doing it to myself. And in that moment, it just hit me like a tonne of bricks, I've done this to myself, you can blame this person, you can blame that you can blame, you know, none of them are going to come along and change things. Only I can do it. And in that moment, the light kind of shone through the blinds a bit, it was sort of early ish in the morning, and I knew my life had changed. Scott, you know, I just knew in that moment, and what it was, is I take in charge, when you put out into society or put out into life, the universe gives you back like tenfold. And that connection with the light coming through the window was kind of almost like not just symbolic of a lot of my beliefs now about about energy, and spirituality. But it was like I finally made a Kinect, I'd had to lose everything or get as low as I could to see the wood for the trees. And in that moment, I thought, You know what, right? I'm not trying to be an angel here, right? I'm not gonna go and join some AAA meeting, or NA meetings or something, that's not my thing. I'm not going to go and join the church because, like, I value my freedom, you know, my freedom or my mind too much. But you know what, I'm going to start cutting down on that stuff. Rather than spend all my money every two weeks, just gonna spend 10 quid asset, one little bag that is when it's done, it's done. I was crash, I know, I'm gonna crash our slate in a wake up and then I'm gonna go about my life. And that was it. That was my transformation. And little by little, I started to have food, food in the cupboards. And then I bought new clothes for the first time in three years. And then suddenly, there's a knock at the door and there's an old mate you haven't seen for ages. And uh, you know, my friend took me in for for a couple of weeks. And he taught me through like, Chris, you, you know, just go and get a job, mate. Okay. Oh, so I went and got a job as a barman, you know, and, okay, the process of change is a long one. lapse and relapse is inevitable. That's just your learning. That's when you learn the most is so you know, what I'm trying to say is nothing's happening overnight. But also it kind of is because you've made you've made that change and, and that was it from that moment on. Like I say, I went on to live work and travel in 85 countries across all seven continents. Got my pilot licence skydiving licence, a backpack for every country in north central South America. I've explored the Antarctic polar circle and scuba dived on icebergs down there. Taught street children in Mozambique. I've lived in Scandinavia off and on for for about four years and taught my fellow students up there, how to build snow, Ks and how to ski. I've driven an old school bus to India and back to write articles on people living in poverty. Think I've written six books now one of them, like I say was an was a best seller. I've got what I think is probably the best podcast in the world. But you're welcome to. You're welcome to take that to knock down a peg May I would be very happy for you.

Scott Radford: 33:47

And all of this came from just a decision to take ownership of your situation and where you're

Unknown: 33:52

at. Yes, yes. And ironically, I'm also I'm English Veteran of the Year or the moment very well deserved for inspiration. You know, I one day I just decided to run the length for the country for about 999 miles. I ran that non stop bar sleeping at the side of the road in my tent, raised I think about 18,000 pounds for veterans mental health. I come last in my first ever triathlon. So I said right in eight weeks time, I'm going to do a quadruple Ironman, or at least a quadruple Ironman distance triathlon. So I did for Ironman in in seven days. I

Scott Radford: 34:33

want to take a few seconds to talk 2040 the sponsors of this podcast because to me, they're the epitome of what high performance is for young leaders and decision makers looking to make a mark to 2040 is a membership community that doesn't just help you accelerate professionally, but it's also helped me grow and develop personally to bowl intensive purposes. This is an opportunity community and it brings together the next generation of exceptional young talent and connects those rising decision makers to help them unlock their fullest potential through the power of their peers and creating the opportunity for each other. Now, when I joined 2014, I went from feeling alone in my entrepreneurial journey and missing the energy and the ideas and a collaboration of others, to having an endless new source of high quality connections. Super long list of the world's highest performers to interview which has been epic. And even this partnership that has allowed us to scale the show, all of its really come from the opportunities presented at 2040. Also, the private events are absolutely legendary. Imagine being able to meet like minded people at really intimate events hosted by global industry leaders, or even just rocking up to a Friday afternoon, we work session for a free bear. It's all available at 2040. So if you're on that journey, as an entrepreneur or a decision maker in your industry, and you want to be immersed by people like yourself, other rising talent, doing the same, going through the same journey, and the same struggles with all the opportunities that that provides, go and check out 20 code on forty.org.uk. All the links will be in the show notes. And I bet it will be the best decision you make this year. It certainly was for me back to the show. Can I just interject here because the list of what you've managed to build after that low moment is not only incredible, but also very extreme. I'm just wondering with the extreme success that you've experienced both obviously being in a really elite unit, like the commando unit, and then building a really successful company and moving out to Asia, and then also the extreme lows that you subsequently experienced as well. You've almost experienced the whole bandwidth of life. And I was speaking to someone about this the other day, how most people sort of operate in the centre part and they're up and down from the from the centerline of this bandwidth. Whereas you seem to have hit that the extremists on both sides, the extreme highs on the extreme lows, do you think they're two sides of the same coin?

Unknown: 36:52

Yeah, again, another great point. What it's important to understand is there's no such thing as bad experiences in life. That's just a societal construct. That's really unhelpful. Because I believe I live in paradise. So every day I wake up, it doesn't matter what's going on in my life that I know, I'm so lucky to have this opportunity in this set of carbon molecules, the chance of this existing is billions upon billions upon billions to one shot, right. So every day I wake up, that's another thing I promised myself. When I was at my lowest I said, right, every day, I'm gonna throw up the curtains. And I'm gonna say, Good morning, son, thank you for this chance at life. And I wouldn't say I do that religiously. But I do quite often remind myself if I if I, if I'm tempted to feel down, I might go and say thank you. And it just reminds me that we are it starts with gratitude. And when I look at my life, I'm just so fortunate, I've been so lucky. If you could meet my family, which I never dreamt of having a family. Like I say if you put out in the universe, you get back and I I met a gorgeous girl. I mean, gorgeous as in just such a loving a loving woman we have a son that I just can't believe is mine. So it's like a dream. beyond my dreams come true. If I hadn't ever lived my life the way that I did, I wouldn't have this. So I think I've done everything right. You know, I think I've, I've made like all the right decisions in life. And yet, society would probably think that I've made like loads of wrong decisions. Well, in hindsight, would I have lived my life? And I know there's a lot of things i i wouldn't opt to do. But yeah, it's fascinating. And you're only going to know your own mind. And you're only going to shed the burden of life and society and unpeel enlightenment, that's what you do. They used to have this concept that enlightenment was a journey. And it's not really enlightenment is the ability to shed everything. To get rid of the lies. Obviously, all of it is is experiential, isn't it? Your whole life's experiential, the more extreme experiences you have. So you know, being in combat, for example, or working for the truck, you you're gonna learn some pretty serious lessons. I'd say the biggest wake up call for me was hitting the bottom what people refer to as rock bottom in addiction. That was a real a moment. The second one was was 911 the realisation that the powers that be if we can call them that can lie to you on such a massive scale. That was a massive wake up. I want more than that, Scott, you know, I want the truth.

Scott Radford: 39:54

What does that allow you to do? What does that unlock like having that truth? Because I guess when you feel like the life is is a small thing that you can kind of control, you have a little bit more agency in your own life, and you don't have to sort of worry too much about things that are outside of your control on a global scale. I'm just kind of interested, you know, with that being a defence mechanism for so many people, it'd be interesting to know what what do you get from understanding the truth, even if you can't control it

Unknown: 40:19

for a start, and I won't even attempt to put this into words, but on a personal level, perfect health is a I'd encourage anyone to seek enlightenment for the fact you never get ill. That's, you know, once you understand, like I say diet is a lie, Western diet is so toxic, and by diet or not, is that's going to confuse a lot of people. Understanding how the body's biology works and how food interacts with it to make to make you ill. That's that's been a massive thing. For me, it means I haven't been ill for for 20 years. I used to be or three or four times a year, every year, and I was miserable being that.

Scott Radford: 41:01

So what sort of things are you changing that have stopped you from becoming aware,

Unknown: 41:05

I've got the idea. encourage anyone to buy these strips on eBay, they call pH strips. Anyone who did chemistry at school might remember might remember these. And you just test your saliva and or you can test your urine, you get a slightly different reading. But for the vast majority of people, you're going to come up acidic, your body's tissues are acidic acid is a root cause of most illness. But if you if your body is toxic, you're never going to experience the natural Hi, that people like myself get. It's called esoterics. It's ancient wisdom, I suppose you'd say. I don't know how much people want to change. The trouble is with materialism and capitalism is it gives people just enough to think that they're doing okay. But not enough to punish them. Like I was punished to go Do you know what actually I can be doing an awful lot better than this. Enlightenment, essentially, is living in the moment. It's that point in your life where you realise the past doesn't exist. It literally is ephemeral? Is that the right word? You know, it's a it's, it's just, it's a silly concept. So if you've only got this moment in time, that means you haven't got to worry about anything in the past, it's gone. It's not going to help you even thinking about Yeah, I'm not saying that you can't smile at good experiences, or, you know, remember people you loved or something, but what I'm saying is, most people let the past dictate who they are, dictate their identity. I'm Chris, I'm an ex Marine. I'm a traveller. I write stessel Nonsense. That's what we call the birth certificate identity. I'm just the concept that we're having this conversation now. Because everything is energy, frequency and vibration. That's it. That's what Nikola Tesla said, if you want to understand the secrets of the universe, you need to understand energy, frequency and vibration. You know, there isn't like one book, you could read that you're gonna go alright, I get it all. Now. It starts with learning to love yourself. It starts with understanding that you can make as much money as you like, you just going to be just as unhappy. If you haven't got these fundamentals in place of understanding who you are, what you are, in the grand scheme of things, then it doesn't matter what position you get at work, it doesn't matter what new car you're going to buy your pleasure, can't lead to happiness. Pleasure is just just temporary, what least happiness is understanding these concepts that we're discussing. And when you understand that, if we are all the universe experiencing itself subjectively, then that means you are me Scott, an IMU, we are the same. What are the implications of that? Well, the implications are suddenly there's no competition between us is that I want a genuinely want the best for you. Your just life experience in itself subjectively in this cluster of, you know, molecules held together by vibration and frequency, to dare to dare to die. I am in this so it gets rid of competition in life. It gets rid of nation state, it gets rid of the need for war. It gets rid of the need to accumulate great riches at the expense of keeping the rest of the world in poverty. Do you see how powerful this these concepts are? So for people listening, if this is of interest, you start by watching my channel, I can't I can't really pick a start and starting off point for you.

Scott Radford: 44:44

One final question I'd like to ask and you mentioned about life being about stories and how you can never have a bad experience in life. I'm quite keen when I was 18. I came up with a little philosophy that was almost like a decision making tool that I gave myself that I've lived by which is life's about stories you can tell either to serve other people later on in life or to serve yourself when you need it. And I'm kind of quite curious to understand with the incredible life that you've lived. Do you have one story today that you're most proud of?

Unknown: 45:12

Ah, I'm sorry to go back on old ground. And I'm sorry if this is not the exciting answer that your view is what the truth is, is when you realise that I'm not Chris through, that's a nonsense, if you buy into your ego, you're never going to find the answers in life that I'd say is the crowning achievement. When you realise you are the or you are everything you when they say God created man in His own image. It doesn't mean like, there was a guy on a cloud, he went, you know what, I'm going to create some humans, I'm going to make them look like me. Don't what it meant is, life is like the blueprint, you know, for everything. We are the blueprint of life, we are that all that everything, like I say, again, experiencing itself subjectively. And that's, that's the biggest thing that I've ever achieved. If you want to talk more in sort of, you know, grassroots, I won't do the cliche, family thing, in terms of achievements. Passing my driving test was huge. I remember that as a really happy day. In my life, getting accepted into the Marines was probably the biggest, biggest thing. In my life. Getting my private pilot licence after I think it was an eight or nine hour exam was pretty special and anatomy that, you know, you know what I mean, they're travelling to the seventh continent, Antarctica was just an amazing experience, although we have one of our divers drowned, which was, wasn't obviously what we plan for, to walk through Heathrow Airport, having been to the place that I told you, I'd been to the depths that I'd been to, and to see my book on the bestseller list. As I'm flying out to Hong Kong for the first time in, I think 15 years, from my, my official book launch, that was like a set of write a best selling book. And there it is, that, you know, I mean, I pat myself on, I gave myself a like a virtual pat on the back then that was nice to be awarded the veterans award, that was really special.

Scott Radford: 47:24

I'm just wondering, what do all these things have in common? Is there a core source that has given you purpose or fulfilment or validation in some way? Throughout all of these little things?

Unknown: 47:35

Yes, very simply, I tell people dream, dream big. Don't let anyone steal that dream. And don't use steal that dream. You know, the number of times people are, I'd love to run a marathon. Oh, come on, is gonna do it. Now. What do you mean, is 26 mile right? Our promise I can get you ran 26 mile. Right now. You've got two legs. What is it that stops people around the length of the country 999 miles, like I say, non stop by sleeping at the side of the road carrying a 15 kilogramme burden on my back with all my my camping gear. Do you know how much training I did for that? Nothing at all. I've been disabled for best part of two years, with a prolapsed desk and a waiting you know, as in I was in bed for the best part of four months of that I couldn't get out of bed. And so after I had a spinal operation or Neurosurgery is it's referred to the first thing I wanted to do was make my dream of running the length of the country get that back online because that's what I was trained to do when my back went. And I thought if I don't, I don't want to run in the winter. I want to wake up with the sun. I want the sun on my face as I'm running along. I want to be able to take lightweight camping equipment, not some big winter sleeping bag. So I've got to go now. So I just went with no training at all. Worked a flight to John O'Groats had a compass it point itself, I started putting one foot in front of the other and, you know, 36 days later after 30 I ran an ultra marathon every day, or at least I averaged an ultramarathon every day. So that's anything over a marathon. no training whatsoever. Okay, so I say to people dream, dream big, and don't steal your own dream, which is what most people do.

Scott Radford: 49:26

Thank you so much for sharing that Chris. That certainly got me fired up and looking at the excuses I'm currently making in my life. Before we finish, we do have some quickfire questions for you. One mantra or belief that has enabled your high performance life. Buy the ticket and take the ride. One ingredient or habit that has contributed to your success the most

Unknown: 49:46

supergreens powder is the quickest way to get your body pH to what it should be which is 7.25 away from all that acidic nonsense that most people live in.

Scott Radford: 49:57

And finally, what's your go to tune or artists for A tough training session or race. Did you listen to any music when you were doing the ultra marathons?

Unknown: 50:04

Yes, I listened to music and audio books all day every day. I absolutely loved it. Once you go to tune then I got to kind of rule with books. Listen to what you like. If something's hard work, I'll shelve it. You know, I like adventure stories. I like reading about people that have climbed Everest or flown planes or got lost in a jungle, whatever. And music for me is got to be house music. Because it's so uplifting son scream perfect motion is just a nice track.

Scott Radford: 50:38

Chris, thank you so much for the vulnerability but also the sort of unfiltered insight into your experience. Thank you for that and all the work you're doing with the veterans foundation. You mentioned before come and find your channels. Can you give people a shout out as to where they can go and find you and follow your work and your insights?

Unknown: 50:57

Yes, just type my name into a search engine and it will all come all my socials are Chris through CHR is th ra ll except Instagram which is Chris dot through. Be great to see people. If anyone is struggling and need like live coaching. You can book that through my through my website, and we'll put all the links in the show notes as well. Scott, that's really kind of you thinking,

Scott Radford: 51:22

Chris, thank you so much.